Psychonauts

Once upon a time, there was this married couple. For a time things were happy until the man took to drinking. He'd go to the bar, then he'd come home and argue and "blow up" over the smallest things, like the wife occasionally forgetting to pick up the Meat or the Milk, or not preparing the Lungfish "just so."

After awhile, the wife was getting tired of it and prehaps a little afraid that the verbal might turn physical. She reasoned that she might have to find a way to protect herself, and thought that a good place to start might be to get an attack dog. She checks the shops around town, but no one would sell her one. Finally she comes to this one shop and asks the clerk about an attack dog. He gives a quick look around the shop and out onto the street, and then leans close to the woman and says: "Look, I can't legally sell you an attack dog, but I've got something in the back you might want to see." Somewhat suspicious but her curiosity piqued, she does so. There, the clerk holds up a wire cage. In it, all the woman can see is some indistinct brown fur ball. She couldn't see past the fur, but from the slight movements it made she suspected there were some Moist Undulations underneath. Slightly disgusted, she asks, "What is that thing?"

With that, the clerk takes the small cage into a much bigger cage, carefully opens the small cage's door, steps out and tosses in a Plunger. He quickly closes the big cage's door and says, "Woolyburger that Plunger!" In a blur, the brown fur ball launches out, dashes around the Plunger and returns to the cage almost faster than the eye can see. All that's left is toothpicks and bits of red rubber. The woman asks for another demonstration, and the clerk tosses in a chair and says, "Woolyburger that chair!" Again, there's a brown blur and all that's left is woodchips. Incredulous, the woman asks for another and the clerk tosses in a table and says, "Woolyburger that table!" What's left can barely be considered kindling. Happily convinced, the woman purchases the creature. She goes home, takes the cage inside and opens the cage door, at which the Woolyburger makes a couple of quick dashes around the inside of her house, then makes itself comfortable (as far as she can tell) in the center of the living room carpet.

Later that night, the husband comes home looking more drunk than usual and swaying like a Matador's cape in the breeze. His eyes manage to focus on the fur ball and so he slurs, "What the heck is that thing?"

Tim Schafer goes to Spain and attends a bull fight. Afterwards he goes to a nearby restaurant and orders the specialty meat dish of the day and a glass of milk. The waiter brings him two very big balls on a huge plate the size of small disco balls, which the Tim eats with relish.

The next day he goes to the same restaurant again, once again orders the specialty of the day, and he is brought two very big balls on a huge plate. It tastes even more scrumptious.

The third day he does the same and the fourth, but on the fifth day he goes to the restaurant and orders the specialty of the day, and they bring him two very small balls on a big plate. The man asks, "What gives?"

And the waiter says, "Senor, the matador doesn't always win!"

Rule #6: Your joke must be "clean" enough for us to post. We know. That's boring but Psychonauts is a T rated game so the joke has to be T rated too. You can take it as far as "poopy" and the like but we can't post the winning jokes if they're too darn dirty!

Ok, first of all, I am from Argentina, my english isnt that good, and I was curious, what "poopy" means ??? I read that in the rules for this contest... I searched in a dictionary and I didnt found the word "poopy" ! I was so angry ! Because I wanted so much to participate in this contest !!! I always wanted those plasma little balls! and because that "poopy" word I cant participate because I dont finish to understand it ! But I cant give up ! I searched on internet translators to find out what the word means and no one translates it ! My brain hurts trying to understand that ugly word, trying to remember if I hearded someplace ... but well... I had an idea to try to find the meaning of that word. I went to my mom's friend house because she is an english teacher, she was there with all her institute friends in the tea-time, eating cookies, drinking coffee and milk, all happly chit chatting, and I said... "Excuse me ladies, you all looks so intelligent and pretty (that was a little lie, they are all fat as a cow and have like 600 years old ), and I need your help... someone can tell me what "poopy" means ?..." Suddenly, they all started to laught at me, at this point I think this thing is a conspiracy against me, I dont have sense of humor and at that point I have emotional baggage because of the stress that the word "Poopy" caused on me. I think this is all a malicious Tim Schafer's idea to make me crazy all because a "Poopy" evil reason. Why are you laughing now ?? Yes, I can feel you are laughing at me, and no, it isnt telepathy, it is poopathy, everytime that someone laughts at me and its related to that stupid word I start feeling strangly sick as now ! Give me a brake !!!!

Please, Answer me as soon as possible with the answer, I cant sleep well since that word appeared in my life.